Something Came Up

I am hopelessly addicted to the White Stripes. I bought the new album the other day and have listened to it all the way through about twenty times and I can't stop thinking about it. And I don't even think its as good as their other albums. And don't talk shit about Meg or her drumming. (Fresh Air, 6-22-2007, interview with Jack and Meg White, listen and understand the essence of their sound, including the drumming) You know who I'm looking at, Paul.

The thing is I don't really fancy myself as being all that into music. And I'm not, really. It's more background noise for me most of the time. But, yeah, I can see how people can go completely nuts for bands and want to follow them around for years and years. When you really connect to something it just stays with you throughout ever moment of the day. I suppose its a little like being in love. Or something less cliche sounding.

I haven't been able to focus on anything for a while now. Not since before finals, really. I mean, other than the White Stripes. I haven't been able to write much. I mean, part of that was all the travel, but I had time to work on stuff, and even when I pull out my mac and sip a half-caf non-fat mochachocaluke-ahmoocow lattechemacchi (that may have gotten a little out of hand, I was trying to poke fun at myself for using a mac. I actually just drink plan coffee. Because its cheap and you can get free refills and if you put enough cream and sugar in it it taste just the goddamn same as a fifteen dollar drink. Or however much they cost. God damn, what is the deal with coffee these days anyway? I mean, I guess it's like booze where people want to drink it for the substance held within its liquid walls but they don't want to actually taste it. Thus we have every fucking combination of liqur that takes the taste out of liqur so that people can pretend they are drinking soda but are really getting drunk. Maybe thats the problem. Too much soda as kids. We don't like the taste of real drinks. So coffee and alcohol suffer. And you get old people as the last refuges of black coffee and straight scotch. Old people rock. I think its that it takes most people that long in life to figure out that the simplier things are the better. (since this parenthasis has gone on so long I'm going to remind you here that I was complaining about how I can't write anything anymore because I can't stay focused on anything (and I'd like to point out in this side-side-side note that this is a perfect case in point) and now we can get back to coffee) Which is to say that if you put all this crap in coffee and get charged a lot more are you really getting anything better? No, you just look cooler, which is why I was making this joke about myself and using my mac) I can't seem to get any work done and I stare at a blank screen. It's annyoing that I can spend so little effort and come out with insane amounts of writing on my blog. Because talking about yourself is always easier to do than talking about anything else, I guess. I don't really have to stay focused or anything.

Today has been another up and down day. It started out alright. Then it got a little better, then it got a little worse, then it got a lot worse, then I had to lie down for a while to calm myself down before I broke my keyboard in frustration, then I had a phone call that confused my sensibilities to a point that made me need to write about myself for a while just to have something to keep my attention for a while. That call. It could lead to something that could be good for me. And it could lead to my untimely death. Or it could lead somewhere inbetween. Or some fourth option. I should watch the Clerks Cartoon. I may have put it in a box, as I thought it would be smart of me to start packing stuff up to take back to fallon and I've yet to pack anything other than my DVD's and I don't have any boxes and I tried to get some boxes today and I couldn't find any in the frieghts behind the mall nor could I get any from the fucking supermarkets near my house and I thought about buying some big tupperware boxes to put all my books in, but they didn't have a price tag on them and I didn't want to spend too much and I thought I should go to Target but it was Saturday afternoon and I had just come from that side of town and this probably isn't very interesting, but damn it, it was just so frustrating at the time and I felt like sharing.

I hate this. This not knowing what to do with myself. I'm all fucking over the goddamn map. Not literally, although, now that I think of it, if it was a map of the US then yes, literally, although not really because the map only represents the US and so I'd be all over what the map was representing. Unless I was actually standing on a map. Which I'm not, and being all over it I could be, but that wouldn't be saying much, would it?

I don't even know what the fuck I'm talking about anymore. Oh yeah.

Fuck, I'm a mess right now.

I'll finish this later. Maybe.